I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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