Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
