stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
