it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
it's great music for shaving your balls
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
