i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I need moral support for this bender
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
