i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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