Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
