Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
tonight lets celebrate not being married
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
