Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
