I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
