Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
