Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
