Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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