the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
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