are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
