Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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