How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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