Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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