Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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