Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dignity is for republicans.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
