Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
