you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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