She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
