yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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