your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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