Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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