Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
mondays should just be called national damage control day
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
