Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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