maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
