Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
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