i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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