SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
