Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
