you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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