If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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