I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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