Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
well you can't waste a boner
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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