Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
