Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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