nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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