Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
