I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
