also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
