Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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