She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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