I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
