I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
