we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
