Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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