You're completely useless in the revolution.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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