Me. At least after what I've been through.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize