I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
